I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
