he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
