i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
