If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
