it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
MIDGETS
????
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize