whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
