I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
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The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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