Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
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