I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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