I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
