If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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