He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
