He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
