Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
