why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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