and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.