we're chasing vodka with high fives
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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