So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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