About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
