9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
