Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
