I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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