so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I puked off the balcony.
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.