she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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