ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
