You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize