She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
