normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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