she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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