'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize