My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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