it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Small penises have feelings too.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize