I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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