I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
