Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
