So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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