the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
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