we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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