I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
