We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
