They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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