I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize