do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
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This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
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I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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