We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
