I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
