I'm going to jail i love you
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
In other news, I just burned my penis
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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