Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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