They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
