I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize