My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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