Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
