How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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